3 idiot chapter 121

Sorry for the late udpate, too busy IRL

Episode 121. Squid Festival

"Kuahahaha! What a haul!"

"Nice, nice, nice! The more I scoop, the more the net gets packed!"

I tossed a huge amount of bait into the sea while Azuma tirelessly scooped with the net.

What we were collecting was a massive amount of seafood... and magic beasts.

Apparently, in this part of the ocean, the regular sea creatures and the magic beasts coexist—not quite peacefully, but they do swim around together more often than not.

We couldn't handle anything too big or too ferocious, of course, but inside the net was a jumbled mess of all kinds of sea creatures.

At a glance, there were so many that we couldn’t even tell which were magic beasts and which weren’t.

Apparently, sorting them out was also part of a fisherman's job.

And more than anything, because the big magic beasts dominate the offshore areas, the regular seafood tends to be caught in larger varieties closer to shore.

"Hiiiii! They're all squirmy!"

"Hurry up! There's more coming!"

Behind us, the two women were working to process the creatures Azuma scooped—finishing them off and tossing them into the magic bag.

And beyond that—

"Nishidaaaa! You doing okay over there!?"

"Yup, not nearly as many as before. I got this, Kou-chan! The fisher guys are steadily gathering ‘normal meat’ too! Smells amazing!"

We left the occasional flying fish that came at us to Nishida, while we focused on drawing as much aggro as possible from the sea creatures.

Whatever didn't get pulled toward us, Nishida handled—and compared to before, he looked downright bored.

We could even hear him chatting casually with the fishermen now and then.

"Gyahaha! It’s been ages since I’ve seen a Walker this flashy! Countin’ on you, Hearty Eater! We’ve got a massive haul today! Fish, squid, octopus—more than you can imagine! We’ll treat ya right, so keep it up!"

"Hell yeah! You guys heard him!? All-you-can-eat tentacle buffet today! Let’s haul back a truckload of fish while we’re at it!"

"“Uwooooh yeah!!”"

"Nozomi-san! Your hands have stopped! If you don’t process them quickly, the seafood’s gonna pile up!"

"I am moving! I am but the pile’s still growing! Where are you even supposed to stab a squid!?"

"Ahh jeez, here! Stab the knife right here! The fishermen showed you, didn’t they!?"

"Kanaa! Switch with meee! Or at least help meee!"

[You got this! Ewww no! They’re too squirmy!]

Voices full of panic were coming from behind, but with more magic beast seafood gathering, we couldn’t afford to stop.

We were using leftovers from land creatures as bait.

Just bones with a little meat stuck to them, but man were they biting.

They came swarming like piranhas, absolutely relentless.

So yeah… sorry, hang in there, Saintess-sama.

Just as I was thinking that—

"Yo, even the flying fish are showing up decently, huh?"

"I heard they’re basically everywhere. Not complaining, they’re tasty. And—ha!"

We swatted away a couple flying fish that had leapt at us and were about to resume our work when—

"Huh?"

"They stopped… the flying fish, I mean."

Even though we kept tossing bait, none of the smaller ones were showing up.

Ah… this is…

Something big’s coming again.

"Everyone on alert! Big one inbound! Fishermen, get back on the boat!"

"It’s probably that ‘Glutton Squid’ everyone’s been whispering about! We’re counting on you, Hearty Eater!"

Just as the clients shouted and dove into the boat’s cabin, giant squid tentacles stretched up to surround the vessel.

They were massive.

Big enough that one of them could probably grab the entire ship on its own.

"Two legs each! Hack ‘em all off!"

"““Got it!””"

"U-Um! What about me!?"

"Stay there! Leave the fighting to us! We’ll need you for the cleanup!"

"R-Right!"

At the Saintess’s signal, we grabbed weapons passed to us from Minami and went to work.

Nishida had already been in guard mode, so he had his weapon ready, but Azuma and I took what we were handed and started cutting the tentacles wrapping around the boat.

I slashed with a spear, and Azuma tore through them with a pickaxe.

Minami pulled out a long butcher’s knife and, a step behind, chopped through two legs of her own.

Nishida, needless to say, had already finished his quota and was calmly collecting the severed tentacles still twitching on the deck by the time I looked back.

And so, with all eight tentacles now sprawled across the deck—

The sense of hostility still lingered sharply.

"The main body’s coming! Everyone stay alert!"

Right as I shouted, the thing appeared from the surface of the sea.

A giant squid.

Maybe something like a Kraken or one of its relatives.

It poked its head out from the water and glared directly at us.

‘Did you remember? Like this, then like this, okay?’

"But… are we gonna be okay?"

Some voices came from behind again, but I ignored them.

Dealing with the giant squid looming right in front of us came first.

"Alright! Let’s go!"

"Protection!"

"Huh?"

Just as I was about to charge in, ready for the showdown—

The Saintess’s spell exploded.

Looked like a peculiar dragon had fed her some weird ideas again.

Two layers of “Protection” barriers came crashing in from above and below, sandwiching the squid like a hydraulic press.

Wait, wait, wait!

That’s no good—you're gonna turn it into squid crackers without warning!

And I mean literally 100% squid crackers.

Just a stinky, crunchy mess.

Also, the scene is horrific—like something out of a gore movie.

Sure, it’s a squid, not a human, but still.

"Kanaaaaaa! You fed her more nonsense again, didn’t you!?"

[W-What are you talking about? I was just trying to finish the job quickly... Ah, look, it’s dead, isn’t it? Should I flatten it even more? It’s kind of gross when it keeps wiggling…]

"You totally hate soft-bodied creatures just from how they look, don’t you!? That’s gotta be it, right!? How the hell are we supposed to eat something that’s been squashed flat like this, you idiot!? Saintess-sama! Hey, Saintess-sama!? Can’t you restore it with healing magic!?"

"Yeah... sorry, that’s definitely impossible."

[Well, since Nozomi’s saying that too, how about we give up on this catch... okay? Let’s go hunt something tastier, yeah?]

"Kana. Sit. Seiza."

[...Yes.]

"See... I told you you’d get scolded..."

The first giant squid I ever saw turned into a cracker in just a few seconds.
Seriously, come on.
There’s no way you can enjoy the texture of something like that.
And the way it looks? Kills your appetite instantly.
All that was left were the squid’s tentacle tips, still squirming a bit.
Guess I’ll have to settle for those.
Not sure if they taste good though.
Thinking that, I began lecturing the reckless dragon.

………………..

………………..

………………..

[Squid is delicious, isn’t it?]

"See? I told you not to judge it by how it looks."

Having worked from morning until night, we had now returned to land.
And in each of our hands, we held a grilled squid given to us by the fishermen.
So damn good.

Fresh squid grilled boldly on a hotplate, with soy sauce, mirin, vinegar, and ginger.
And, apparently something the old fishermen insisted on—splashing way more sake than usual over the squid.
It felt like we were at a festival. Been ages since I had something like this.

"We’ve got plenty more! Eat up! We’ve got booze too, so drink with us, Hearty Eater!"

Surrounded by the hearty laughter of the sea-faring men, we sampled dish after dish that kept coming nonstop.
Man... the ocean is the best.

"Here, we separated out the magic beasts that got mixed in. ...We heard from that Daryl guy, but are you seriously gonna eat those?"

One of the older men, looking a bit taken aback, handed over a pile of smaller magic beasts caught during the haul.

Ohh~ these little ones really are hard to tell apart.
Like shishamo with a sharper jaw, or something along those lines.
Even so, they’ve still got magic stones in their hearts, so we can’t just roast and munch on them as-is.

"To us, these guys are still a proper feast."

"You guys are seriously weird..."

He muttered with a baffled face, but joined the feast anyway.
The chatter grew louder, and more fishermen who had finished work started to gather around.

I love this kind of carefree vibe.
Everyone just brought along some fish or booze, or even noodles, and the crowd kept growing.

"Got squid yakisoba ready! Who wants some!?"

"Yakisoba!"

We all continued enjoying the flood of seafood dishes being prepared one after another.
With some drinks on the side, we started chatting about the next day’s work when—

[Kitayama, Kitayama]

"Hmm? What is it?"

Kana tugged at my sleeve.

[How about trying the big squid? Its legs are still intact.]

"You... You’re totally into it now, aren’t you."

Seems like the dragon was now regretting squashing the giant squid and wanted grilled tentacles.
Well, whatever.

"Alright then, let’s give it a shot. Minami, prepare the grill."

"Roger that."

"Oh, Kou-chan, going for the giant tentacle?"

"I’ve never heard of anyone eating giant squid before. Wonder what it’s like."

As the Hearty Eater members gathered, the nearby fishermen started gathering too.
Seems like they were interested.
Though, for now, none of them seemed willing to try eating it themselves.

"Well, just to try it out. No idea if it’ll be good."

With that, I pulled a leg of the giant squid from my bag.
Maybe because I’d hacked it off and tossed it straight in, it was still wriggling around.

"Wha—!? Oi, is this a Gluttonous Squid!?"

"Dahaha! It was amazing, you know? This monster got squashed like a small fry!"

While the fishermen started getting all riled up, I washed the massive squid leg.
If it's slimy, it stinks like hell, so I had to wash it real good.
Then I rubbed salt into it, chopped it up roughly, and slammed it onto the grill.

It looked impressive—despite the grill being quite large, the thing barely fit.
I grilled it boldly while sprinkling on generous amounts of seasoning.
With all the soy sauce and other stuff I was using, it was closer to boiling than grilling.
And I figured I wouldn’t be able to cook it through properly unless I steamed it well.

So I put a huge lid over the grill, one made specially for it.
Seriously, thank Tharle for making all this stuff.

"It’s starting to smell pretty good. Think it’s ready?"

"Let’s try a bite."

"I wanna eat the tip of the leg!"

Everyone started chiming in as we lifted the lid.
A burst of fragrant steam filled the air, the scent of squid and seasonings wafting everywhere.

And then—emerging from the mist was a gigantic grilled tentacle.
It already looked delicious.
And the visual impact? Off the charts.

[T-This is amazing…]

"It’s huge…"

The Saintess-sama duogulped as they peered at the grill.
The surrounding fishermen were also watching intently.

Alright then—time to eat.

“””tadakimasu!”””

We all bit into chunks of the tentacle we’d chopped up… but.

"It… it’s tough…"

"I-I can’t bite through it…"

[…Huh? This isn’t what I expected.]

From inside our mouths came a crunchy, almost grinding texture—
Like someone had taken normal squid and cranked the toughness up tenfold.

It wasn’t just firm—it was way too firm.
I had a feeling it’d be tough when I was cutting it, but not this bad.

Around us, people started murmuring things like,
"That’s what you get for eating a magic beast..." or "Yeah, figured as much..."

"But hey, the flavor’s good. Tough as hell, though."

"Yeah, it's like all the taste is super condensed. The flesh is just... way too condensed too."

"If we slice it real thin, I think we could eat it just fine. Even then, it’d probably have a crazy texture."

The taste was honestly great.
Sure, it was tough.
We were gnawing and crunching through it, but the flavor had a deep umami.

So I chewed down what I already had in my mouth, and started slicing the rest of the leg thinner.

Holding out a few of the thin slices to Nishida and Azuma with a "How about this thickness?",
both of them popped a piece into their mouths and gave a solid thumbs-up.

So I grabbed a slice for myself.
Still firm—maybe a bit more than “chewy”—but definitely edible.
With this thickness, you could bite through it, and the flavor was far deeper than regular squid.

If we turned this into squid somen, it’d be a premium snack with intense texture and flavor. (Noodle squid)

As I kept slicing it up in bulk,

"I-I finally finished mine!"

"Mmm—Mff! Huff, huff!"

Minami, looking like her jaw was a little sore, and the Saintess-sama who was still grinding away, wandered over toward the squid slices.

[...Phew, I finished mine.]

"Kana… you went too hard. My jaw hurts."

Despite the complaints, everyone now calmly started chewing on the sliced version.

This time, it seemed to be a hit—they both started happily munching away.

[The body part… can’t we do something with it?]

"Yeah, that’s a no-go. It’s completely flattened. I’ll just pull out the magic stone and use the rest as chum."

[Ughh…]

"Next time, instead of just squashing it, how about actually hunting it properly, huh?"

[…Yes.]

I patted the dejected dragon girl on the head and took a swig of booze with my squid snack.

Ahh, this stuff’s great.
It’s so good with alcohol I might just end up overdoing it.

Maybe if I grilled the squid slices again to give them a bit of char, they’d be even better.
Might as well give it a try.

As I kept experimenting—

"You guys are really makin’ that look tasty…"

"But it’s a magic beast, isn’t it…"

Seems like today, the fishermen’s self-control won out, even as they drooled.

That’s fine. I don’t plan on forcing it on anyone.
If they ever get the craving, I’ll share it then.

So, for today—

"Delicious."

—we devoured the tasty snacks all for ourselves.

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